acaseofyou | open post

[ ooc: 'Cicero the Nugget' does have a good feel to it ngl. ]

Well, let me know when one day comes. I'll get you in touch with someone that'll appreciate you well enough to deserve your company.

Me, too. If I ever manage it, I'll keep you from being on the wrong side of me for a demonstration.

A real health code violation. Or a sex act.

[OOC: TY! Do you just have the one kitty?]

If you know of someone who'd make a good business partner now, I'm not opposed to a meeting being set.

Yes, that would be preferrable. I do enjoy my limbs and extremities. Drama has it's place, but at another's expense.

I was thinking it would likely be both.

[Nina somewhere, sometime, lets Birdie know about the nickname Waffles.]

[ ooc: There's also Lexi, named after a character from Grey's Anatomy by my mother. They're with her. ]

I know of a few, though they're not around here. I'll reach out and see if they want to expand anything this way, though.

Good, because I enjoy your limbs and extremities, too. We can have drama other ways.

So, a sex act that would cause a health code violation?

[ Kaz will probably be able to hear Birdie laughing about it from all the way in his office somewhen it happens. ]

[OOC: Aw, that's so cute! I love the name Lexi. I have one other doggo named Mara after a Star Wars character, so I can relate to your mother, LOL.]

Let me know what you find out.

Other people losing limbs for example.

That’s pretty much what came to mind, yeah.

[ ooc: Oh, friend, I love a good Mara SW reference. I still have an EU Han journal around somewhere. ]

Of course. Even if they're not expanding personally, they'll have clanmates around they might put forward. Just don't let on how much I've told you about things.

Did you have someone in particular in mind for this bit of target practice?

You think I could a song out of 'Dirtyhand my Cupcake' or is it a bit too far?

[OOC: Ahh, awesome! It's always lovely to meet a fellow EU fan. :D Mara is my fav SW character but Han is up there, too.]

I try and talk as little as possible in general. Save it up for when a speech is really needed.

A few Council members, brothel owners, and Fjerdan militia come to mind.

If you're performing on a pirate ship it might work.

[ ooc: We are rare but resilient! :3 And Mara is fantastic. Han is just an agitated wookiee man. ]

I'd like to hear one of those. A real rally, see how much pomp you put into it.

That can be arranged. Might take a while for me to get there, but I'm sure if they're gone by then you'll have new targets ready and waiting.

Oh, that's a good idea, though. Make it like a sea shanty. Another credit for That Guy.

[OOC: Indeed! And that's the best kind of man, really.]

I'll let you know the next time I need to swipe a gang away from somebody or embarrass a Councilman in public.

I'm sure I will. People like that spring up everyday to replace the ones that get whacked down. Like those moles.

It doesn't hurt that I know a pirate. Two pirates.

[Somewhere, Kaz is sure Nikolai has the urge to scream 'privateer!']

[ ooc: It's the wookiee proximity, instant elevation. ]

If you have to do it in the daylight please record it for me.

You know, the trick to that game is having one person for every two moles. Makes it a lot more manageable.

That is impressive. I can just see you now, out on the high seas, standing on the deck and looking very seriously over the water. Possibly scheming about a kraken or something.

I'd probably watch it too just to give myself tips for improvement.

That is a good ratio. I've done the one against the world, it got tedious.

I think Inej would make me walk the plank on her ship if I took over with schemes. Lantsov would likely be fine with it.

Take notes on inflection and word choice?

I can imagine it'd get overwhelming very fast. Though I am always happy to lend a helping mallet.

Now, the plank is a shame, but do you mean Lantsov like the Ravkan royal family Lantsov or is that just a coincidence?

Not to mention any pointed cane gesturing.

And I'm happy to have you help. I got over the solo gig quite a few years ago when I realized those I was going up against weren't alone.

The one and the same, he's the other person I know with ships at his disposal, due to the royal heritage.

Oh, true. You can get pretty emphatic with that thing, especially when you hit someone with it to make a point.

Very few at the top are, no matter how much they might want you to think they had no help. With you at the helm, though, I imagine you'll fare better with better helpers than the rest of them you're going against.

Hell. Am I going to have to pretend to like monarchies if he comes around?

It's a very handy addition to my limb collection. Especially since it's been reinforced.

Being scrappy has gotten us this far. I count you in that group too, you know. Not officially, no tattoo required, but you've been a scrappy help, too.

I certainly don't. He's pretty open to criticism on politics, even if he's in over his head figuring out what to do about it. He also seems to think I can wave a hand and affect Kerch taxes on sugar exports to Ravka, which is great. Love that reputation for myself.

Edited 2023-10-10 16:41 (UTC)

You do certainly know how to use it.

I'm happy to be there. You've got a good coterie for yourself.

Ha! I love that reputation for you, too! You think we could convince him of anything else? Entirely selfish reasons regarding my personal amusement, of course.

I do. Though I can't be too complimentary. Gotta leave room for improvement.

I absolutely think that we could, and should. He even went to school in Ketterdam for awhile, which makes it either even sadder how little he knows, or I should just be flattered how highly he thinks of my skills. Or both.

Oh, yes. Can't let them know how good they are when they can be better.

Both. Absolutely both. What else do you think we could get him with? I do know those Kaelish songs, maybe we can start with convincing him of that college coffee house ruse and see where it leads.

It's imperative to stay hungry in life.

Good idea, I think we can try it the next time he and Zoya have a problem their morals won't let them fix by themselves.

You don't have to tell me twice on that one.

I could also tell him about my time in court, and technically I wouldn't even be lying.

For you it might apply in more than one context.

If ever there was someone who deserved a truth found via squinting sideways, it's Lantsov.

Metaphorical and blood-related?

When do you think he'll come up against a morality wall? I want to try this now.

Got it in one, though there's some assumption on my end that draws from vampire lore on the perpetual hunger part.

I suppose it depends on what you mean by a morality wall. Do you mean broad politics of why monarchies still exist, or interpersonal moralities of him accepting dares for the chest puffing bragging?

It's not so ironically all-consuming as some of the stories make it out to be. But it is... Consistently present.

Mostly anything that gets him to come here and ask you for favors.

So, a perpetual teenager's appetite. I recall a time when full was never an option.

I actually did hear from his lovely general recently, so you might not have to wait long in that respect.

Something like that, yeah. You know how sometimes you'd get more hungry when you smell food? That, too.

Very good. I trust you'll play along with whatever nonsense I start, right?

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